for philosophy_20: faith
Nov. 7th, 2008 04:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
heroslayerSylar doesn't sleep that night.
He tries--and it should be easy, laying in Mohinder's arms, sore and sated--but he can't. He just lays there in the dark, watching the rise and fall of his chest, sihlouetted by the light coming in off the windows. He lays there in the dark, listening to the sound of his heartbeat, his usual lullabye, drowning out the sounds of the city beyond the walls of the loft. He lays there in the dark, and thinks of death.
Mohinder killed him tonight, and he can't begrudge him it, can't bring himself to seek penance. Not when his geneticist was right in doing so. Not when he knows he wouldn't have stopped otherwise, ticking and fury having driven him in the moments before death. He thinks the Indian did the right thing--even told him as much when he'd pulled himself up off the concrete, tendon and muscle and bone working to correct themselves--but he can't take his mind off it. He hasn't been religious in more than a decade, but he can't help but wonder why there was nothing.
He'd at least been expecting some kind of monster from Hell--he's still sure he's going there, even if he doubts the existence of God--reaching up to try and pull him down. He'd escape, of course, run screaming from the choking scent of brimstone and the promise of eternal damnation, but there was nothing. Only black. Only a disappointing hole in his otherwise unblemished memory, which the hunger had bled out through like paint down a drain.
It's unsettling. And it rattles his faith, the one he though he'd been free of ages ago, more soundly than anything he could have dreamed of doing himself.
Muse: Gabriel Gray (Sylar)
Fandom: Heroes
Word Count: 287
Notes: What the mun does when she can't sleep. :D
He tries--and it should be easy, laying in Mohinder's arms, sore and sated--but he can't. He just lays there in the dark, watching the rise and fall of his chest, sihlouetted by the light coming in off the windows. He lays there in the dark, listening to the sound of his heartbeat, his usual lullabye, drowning out the sounds of the city beyond the walls of the loft. He lays there in the dark, and thinks of death.
Mohinder killed him tonight, and he can't begrudge him it, can't bring himself to seek penance. Not when his geneticist was right in doing so. Not when he knows he wouldn't have stopped otherwise, ticking and fury having driven him in the moments before death. He thinks the Indian did the right thing--even told him as much when he'd pulled himself up off the concrete, tendon and muscle and bone working to correct themselves--but he can't take his mind off it. He hasn't been religious in more than a decade, but he can't help but wonder why there was nothing.
He'd at least been expecting some kind of monster from Hell--he's still sure he's going there, even if he doubts the existence of God--reaching up to try and pull him down. He'd escape, of course, run screaming from the choking scent of brimstone and the promise of eternal damnation, but there was nothing. Only black. Only a disappointing hole in his otherwise unblemished memory, which the hunger had bled out through like paint down a drain.
It's unsettling. And it rattles his faith, the one he though he'd been free of ages ago, more soundly than anything he could have dreamed of doing himself.
Muse: Gabriel Gray (Sylar)
Fandom: Heroes
Word Count: 287
Notes: What the mun does when she can't sleep. :D
Re: ooc;
Date: 2008-11-07 07:43 pm (UTC)Thank you, my love~♥Awesomesauce. :D